Dreams Of Doubt

I doubt everything,

I ache for faith,

but I doubt everything.

I dreamed of the Sistene ceiling

and I stretched my hands out 

without any real effort 

to touch (what? The divine?)

Holy dust poured from my hands,

A priest approaches,

He anoints my brow 

while chanting:

"Hail Mary, full of grace,

the Lord is with thee; 

blessed art thou amongst women, 

and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus. 

Holy Mary, Mother of God, 

pray for us sinners, 

now and at the hour of our death."

The priest is a blur of black and white, 

He tells me to repeat the prayer

I cannot will my mouth to move,

He traces the shape of a cross 

in the air before my eyes

"May the words

be in your heart

on your lips

and in your mind"

The priest expects me to speak,

still I cannot will my mouth to move.

I gaze up maybe 

the words will come 

if I am inspired by 

the work above,

But I see a massive mirror

where there was 

once an ornate fresco,

I see only 

my own reflection

No god, and no Michelangelo.